Thursday, October 22, 2009

Calmness

That's me, Mrs. Calm. Well with some minor moments of anxiety, but I just say a quick "Our Father" and it all goes away. Tuesday was just a particularily rough day for me. Not only was I dealing with all this preggo stuff but I got into three separate "discussions" about plans for soccer. Nothing major, just a difference of opinions that eventually got worked out. I just really don't like confrontation. For years, I coached with three other people so any parent/coach/club issues that came up, I knew I wasn't alone and that they would stand behind me. But since I moved away from them, it's just been me by myself. I know the club is behind me, but sometimes I forget. Anyways, like I said, it got all worked out by EOD Tuesday.
Tuesday night when I went to bed I really dedicated myself to praying. I say little prayers all the time, but this time I really wanted to release everything over to God. So I prayed. I prayed about a lot of things but the thing I stayed away from was praying for this pregnancy. That might sound weird but I reasoned it out in my head that asking for GV not to be a blighted ovum or miscarriage seemed somehow to doubt that God had given me this incredible gift and was moving me along His plan. So I prayed for my family, Kevin's, all of you. And I drifted off to sleep still praying.
Wednesday was the complete opposite to Tuesday. I just felt so much better, not as anxious and able to think about this pregnancy in a positive mood. I felt so much better that when Dr. Grrr called I didn't answer the phone. I was in such a good place that I didn't want to bring up the events/feelings of the day before. But of course I did call him back. He did a great job of reassuring me that I was normal (with normal minimal pg symptoms) and based on what he's seen so far I have nothing to worry about. And in the end he reminded me that nothing we do right now is going to change anything about GV. If somthing is wrong on Tuesday nothing I did, Kevin did or Dr. Grrr did could have changed that. Tuesday we'll know and take the steps necessary at that point. It really did make me feel better. He also reminded me that he was the doctor on call this weekend so if anything changed (spotting, cramping, bleeding) I could call and know that he would be the doctor answering.
Yesterday was also Chicklet's 3 month birthday! Wow! I can't believe she's been around that long. Chicken posted new pictures and she's so precious. myMom thinks she's looking more and more like Chicken.
Today has been relatively calm too. Kevin and I are preparing for this weekend. I have four(!) soccer games, one on Friday & Saturday and two on Sunday. One to watch, two to coach and one to play in. Plus this weekend we are going to Les and Dave's first agility competition. We were going to go to it on Sunday, but then my game (the one I coach) got rescheduled for Sunday so we had to switch to Saturday. This means I'll miss Dave's Jumpers run but I should make it for the Standard one. Gonna be busy this weekend, but I'll be sure to keep you all updated.

4 comments:

~Jess said...

I'm keeping you guys in my prayers.

Amanda said...

Glad you are channeling the calmness. Don't let it get away!

I started going to adoration weekly when I was TTC. It is a good time for me to sit and think about things without other distractions and remind myself what's important. It's a very peaceful time if you wanted to incorporate it into your schedule (if you don't already).

A said...

I am so excited you're feeling calm!!! I checked way too many times again today for an update ;-) Have a great weekend!

Karen said...

I hope you're just one of the lucky one who has easy, symptom-free pregnancies!