Tomorrow I'm attending an Infertility Support Group meeting. Back in September, I was dealing with the beginnings of infertility. But still, I didn't consider myself to have a real problem. I thought "It's just temporary, with diet, exercise and drugs, my body will work. We'll get pregnant fast, once I take the drugs." I didn't want to label myself as infertile.
At Church, we have a weekly bulletin. In it, I saw a announcement that there was a Infertility Support Group at another church at the end of the month. I felt a strong calling to attend that meeting. I wanted to talk to someone face to face about what was going on. I wanted to talk to someone face to face who was going through the same thing I was. But still, I struggled with admitting that I was infertile. So when something else came up that allowed me to skip that meeting, I did. I was weak and rather than admit that I really truly was in fact facing a fertility problem I allowed myself to skip that meeting.
On Sunday, back in church, I regretted it. I knew I should have gone and now it was too late. So I checked the bulletin and nothing. No mention of it. So I waited. October passed by and nothing. And then November started coming to a close and still nothing. So last week I decided to google for it. I found the blog of the woman who helped start it. On her blog, she had a post about the group and when the next meeting was. It was within two weeks. I was so excited that I immediately sent her an email. I knew that this time I HAD to go. I would force myself to get up early on Saturday and attend. I don't need labels to have permission to go, I just need to have the need for support. And I do.
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2 comments:
Hi kMo, thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting! I am so so glad you went to the support group and felt supported. I love the last part of your post about not needing a label for permission to go, you just need support. We're just leaving that grey area of non-diagnosed-but-really-difficult-infertility, and I struggled with not having the label but still feeling it. That line of your post says it all! I look forward to following your story.
makingmemom.blogspot.com
Hi, glad you went to the group, after all. I can totally understand your hesitation initially. I am also "infertile" -- wish there were a group like this in my neighborhood. It's a strange predicament, because it's not quite as serious as a disease like cancer, etc... but folks tend to discount infertility as a "non-issue"... the reality is for those of us who are TTC, it's a BIG issue.
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